I am English

March 2010

My German has improved significantly, since standing on a U-bahn train in Berlin, shouting, in panic, "I am English" when being asked if this was the correct train for a destination I did not know, in what I guessed was German. The girl probably just wanted to know if the train went east. This week I managed to write a whole side of (I wish I could say A4 as that sounds more impressive) A5 in German, detailing a fictional meeting with Luisa in a cafe. I found out her name, where she was from, where she lived and bought her a coffee - I said I'd pay to the waitress too. Smooth.

July 2010

Saturday - 6:20am

My German probably has not improved since leaving the UK. We've been in Berlin a week and hardly had the chance. Our classes at Goethe were not really geared towards explaining that the second hand bike you were purchasing needed a rear light, the brakes fixing and you wanted a bike that did not screech. Who needs the lingo when you can use sign language and as Luisa did - get the whole shop making screeching noises?! Anyway, I promised a blog, so here it is for what it is worth.

This blog is going to be dedicated to Nana Wilson - hello Nana! Sit comfortably in that new chair and put your feet up. I will write Nana (using a pen) but for now you'll have to read printed out versions of this blog. A blog is a diary that people write on the internet. I will also directly address people throughout this. Don't feel left out though if I don't directly address you - it probably just means I can't think of an amusing way to do it. On that score, I have just woken up from a dream where Gav got Tim a job at Dods. Vodd.

Everyone said that Berliners were an unfriendly bunch. I can see glimpses of the unfriendly Berliner but invariably I have found the Berliner charming. We've been approached and offered help with directions by a young woman who did not seem unhinged. In London, it always seemed to be the nutters who would pro-actively offer assistance. The Turkish man in the local bakery kindly explained the name of the huge piece of bread (Fladenbrot) and was very cheerful to boot. On Sunday we are off to purchase two mobile phones (Orange are evil, they won't unlock our phones) for 10 Euro each. Bargain. The lady we are dealing with seems very friendly. John at the letting agency is friendly but he wants our cash so perhaps we won't count him. In summary, it is summer and the Berliner seems OK. I understand they change when it has been snowing for weeks on end. Jury still out but we'll give them the nod for now.

Our first viewing of a property in Berlin was a strange old affair. It was quite a studenty abode, so we knew instantaneously that it was not for us, but we played along with the viewing charade for the experience. The 'group viewing' idea is novel, efficient and akin to a beauty parade - quite an ugly one at that. Tessa is going travelling to New Zealand for 9 months and was renting her fully furnished apartment out. We were looking round the place trying to dodge the friend who was lurking in the bathroom - if anyone ever has a friend round for morale support when conducting a viewing please tell them to be seated. In the lounge. Very unnerving. There were a rather annoying couple who were the type of people who asked questions for the sake of it. The type of people who asked how much it was going to cost - after reading an advert online and booking an appointment to see the place. These were the people at school who had their hand up constantly and at work these are the people that cause meetings to be longer than they should.

I deal in Farenheit. Today it will be nearly 100. That, if you are a pasty skinned north easterner, is very hot. We'll thus be heading to a lake so that they aforementioned pasty skinned one can jump in the water to keep cool. There seems to be a 'lake culture' here which I guess is akin to Londoners heading to the nearest green space or Brighton when it is a weekend and a 'scorcher'. There's a tabloid hack in me somewhere. In other news it is 'British week' at Lidl so we have baked beans. Apparently in Britain, we also consume vast amounts of blackcurrent squash, shortbread, pre-cooked Thai noodles and 'black' tea.

I'm bored now so you lot must be. Bis dann.